two kids and some babies

Sometimes I wonder which one is more futile, the war on terror or the war on CO2.

Despite our government’s best efforts on both fronts, neither seems to be yielding great results. Man-made global warming is a hoax, so you can’t fight it at all. And hating the USA is the world’s favorite sport, with the most enthusiastic fans obviously coming from the middle east. Yet somehow, we seem to be equally (un)successful in combating either.

Both employ ridiculously ineffective measures. On the global-warming front, you have cap-and-trade, laughably low-quality compact fluorescent light bulbs, and a President who flies to Copenhagen so the Indians and Chinese won’t have to laugh at him over the phone. What have we succeeded in? Scaring the gullible with sappy videos of drowning polar bears.

In our struggle against crazy muslim fundamentalists terrorists: The new hour-long pat-down exercise Sue, Silas, Brianna and I endured to be allowed to return to our country wouldn’t have stopped the Nigerian terrorist who tried to blow up that plane Christmas day (henceforth referred to as The Fruit-of-the-Boom Bomber… thanks Rush).

I seriously doubt these space-age near-pornographic full-body-scanners they’re going to install at airports will stop the future terrorists, who will simply find more creative (and possibly unpleasant) compartments in which to hide the tools of their trade. All we seem to have been successful at is giving those bored-looking airport security guards an embarrassing new toy, and making hour-and-a-half late plane departures the status quo.

Maybe we’re doing better than the media lets on at stopping terrorists. Maybe the government can’t let us know every time they catch one of these demon-inspired lunatics for security reasons. All I know is that, from where I stand, we seem to be about as effective at stopping terrorists from attempting to down planes as the hippies are at stopping the sun from doing its job keeping me toasty.

I see only three solutions:

1.The government needs to be more effecive in communicating how often we successfully stop terrorist activities.
2.The government needs to take off the kid gloves and use more effective measure to stop them, even if it includes the uncomfortable reality of profiling. Lives are at stake.
3.We just let Al Gore figure it all out.